Sahib Biwi And Gangster from its first look seems to be a medium-budget film that invests and cut costs at various stages of production. With a fairly well-known lead cast with the exception of currently struggling and off-color Randeep Hooda, the film introduces many a fresh faces in the first 10 minutes leading to a confusion of characters and plots. You feel you are in for another directorial misadventure. Well, in a way you are and you are not. You are because the film puzzles at times like whose side is Babloo (Randeep Hooda), the driver of royal Sahib (Jimmy Shergil) is on – Sahib’s or his rival’s. The saving grace, as you move on, is convincing acting of Jimmy Shergill. He settles easily into the character and has the swagger and arrogance that royals often display often without material, as is in this case.

Sahib is earning his butter courtesy some petty crimes and the money he gets from his father’s mistress who has inherited all the royal property. His wife, the so-called Biwi, is a sex-starved, psychologically ill woman who befriends unknown men quite seamlessly. The main plot is that from the movie that inspired the modern version of Guru Dutt-directed classic Sahib Biwi Aur Ghulam. SAG (Sahib Bibi Aur Gangster) is a cool rip-off that entertains today’s generation and also plays with an underexplored genre of royalty (my last favourite was Eklavya). Moving forward with the plot, Sahib recruits a con driver in Babloo who develops a steamy affair with Biwi. As the story moves further, and for a change it is a well-paced film, Sahib sorts out his political mess with the help of Babloo and a loyal assistant. Babloo also helps Sahib kill his main rival, hence developing a bond with Sahib. On the other hand, he does an Omkara-kind of act by getting Sahib against his mistress and eventually getting her killed.

The story ends with an envious Babloo taking a shot at Sahib, and Biwi shooting at Babloo. The paralysed Sahib ends up as Biwi’s card to stand in elections. Overall, Sahib Biwi Aur Gangster is a good pastime that entertains and puzzles. With a slightly better plot, directorial value and editing, it could have been a modern cult hit. Also, Randeep Hooda is a huge letdown. He looks out of sorts and barely convincing. Mahi Gill fails to exude the charm and pathos of Meena Kumari of original. Music is at best average.

For those who are DT Cinemas loyals, beware of their cafe’s coke. It tastes like sugarless soda. Such a spoiler!

The reason I was looking forward to Johnny English Reborn was that I had thoroughly enjoyed Johnny English when it was released some 5 years back. For the uninitiated, Johnny English, played by the inimitable Rowan Atkinson (popularly known as Mr Bean), is a spoof/parody of James Bond, the suave MI7 agent. Johnny English Reborn does not match the earlier version but is a laugh riot in parts. The movie begins funny and ends funny and in between has its funny moments though some are bit stretched, like the helicopter and Hong Kong chase gangster chase. The storyline is pretty much predictable but then that’s never the motivation with such films.

The film begins in the hills of Tibet where Johnny English, after a fiasco in his last operation in Mozambique, is in a monastery for five years, learning some unimaginable arts like dragging a rock with his penis and easily taking blows on his groin. He is summoned by the MI7 when the intelligence learns that the Chinese Premiere is under threat when he’d be meeting the British Prime Minister. The comedy of errors begins right there. For those who have followed Rowan for ages will get to see his famous facial expressions and antics. One of the most laughable scenes is when he is having a discussion with the British PM and the intelligence team, and his chair elevates and descends to the level of the table. As usual, Mr English’s expressions complement well.

The leading lady Rosamund Pike is quite incidentally played by bond girl in real James Bond movie, Die Another Day. The stunner plays the role of a psychoanalyst and love interest of Johnny English though she barely has 20 minutes of screen presence. Rest of the cast does its job where the major attention of the audience is certainly on Mr Atkinson.

Johnny English will in parts remind you of James Bond Movies and Where Eagles Dare especially in the end where English chases the antagonist on a moving trolley in the Alps. The directorial value could have been better and the some scenes more succinct. The movie lacks novelty but will still make you laugh.

Crazy Stupid Love is like that ODI where the first set of 15 overs are entertaining and the last ten are slam bang. It’s the in-between where the customary singles ate taken that the game gets predictable and boring. CSL is a film that promises much to begin with, with impressive plot build-up, rib-tickling dialogues and performing star cast. Carl is 44, with a dream job and a loving family. One day, his wife, Emily, asks for a divorce and the poor guy agrees without giving any argument. Emily, his wife (eternally supreme Julianne Moore) is having an affair with an accountant in office.

The real story begins when Carl meets the Casanova punk Jacob while ruing over his fate in a bar. Upon his recommendation, he changes his avatar to fashion cloth-wearing, pickup line-expert like confident middle-aged man who goes on a women-sleeping spree (he accidentally sleeps with his son’s teacher). That’s a way to get his women back and he eventually does in the end. In between all that, Jacob falls in love with Carl’s daughter and Carl’s son falls for the babysitter at home who has a sexual crush on Carl. The whole mash up does create a confusion and leads to a good old Romcom.

The problem with the film is the treatment. The two directors of the film previously made Jim Carrey-starrer I Love Philip Morris which was a hugely despicable. In parts where they drift from plot building towards movement of the plots, the film becomes a parody of cult hits American Beauty and my favorite Fight Club. There are ill-treated romantic scenes that fail to make you feel. Tear-jerking does not happen when it’s supposed to be. It tries to become a film where you laugh and a tear drops off your eyes, but that does not happen. You are at best grinning. For me, Crazy Stupid Love started well and ended satisfactorily. The script writer somewhere lost the steam in between, trying to perhaps make another cult hit like American Beauty. All in all, it’s a one-time watch with impressive performances.

I stumbled upon Love Actually VCD last week and bought it at a mouth-watering price of Rs. 69 (I bought 5 others too). I had heard of Love Actually earlier, but I have never been a fan of Rom-Coms so never had the motivation to watch it. However, Love Actually is not a typical Jack Nicholson kind of Rom-com. It is a bit different as it delves into various kinds of love – between husband and wife, father and son, prime minister and his housemaid (with no inspiration from Clinton-Lewinsky incident), boss and secretary, colleagues, brother and sister, woman and his man’ best friend, etc. The film starts with a touching voice over from the ever good-looking Hugh Grant who talks about various forms of love and how it touches him to see people meeting with warmth at Heathrow Airport.

Love Actually has quite a few stories, ten of them if I am not wrong. They are not exactly interwoven, but people do come to the common point (Heathrow) at the end. One of the most brilliant aspects of Love Actually is excellent performance by each actor. We have the recently Academy Award winning Colin Firth as a writer who gives a tear-jerking performance. Then there’s the affable Hugh Grant as Prime Minister who is attracted to a chubby staff member, and takes no guard when verbally attacking his powerful American counterpart (played by an unassuming Billy Bob Thorton). My favourite however is Bull Nighy, an ageing yet witty pop star who redoes the old number “Love is all around” replacing the word “love” with “Christmas.” He is absolutely funny, full-of-life and adds the much needed humor in between some high emotion. Laura Linney (Mystic River, Man of the Year) plays a charming, sensible worker who is in love with a colleague for over two years, but when things do come true, she goes to provide comfort to her mentally sick brother. Good performance, by her!

Liam Neeson is wasted in a role that was made for someone like Robin Williams. Keira Knightly hardly has any screen presence and timing. Emma Thompson does well in a crucial role of Prime Minister’s sister, a dutiful mother, and a tolerant wife. The best part of the film is the way climax is done. In a clichéd sense, it makes you laugh while you realize you also have a tear in your eye.  Rowan Atkinson (our favourite Mr Bean) is superb in his small role as an obsessed gift wrapper.

For all reasons that you should watch the film, watch it to witness love in many forms and sizes and countries. I liked the way it started and ended, and everything in between was entertaining. And then it quite formidably reasserts the fact that love is indeed all around and within us.

Even after trying hard, it is difficult to gather what’s so funny about Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara. Zoya Akhtar, in a quest to rake in some quick money, has got together a handful of bankable actors, made them shed their acting skills and acquire mediocrity, put in a trip to Spain, and made hash of a script that could have been used to make an average film. ZNDB is worse than slapstick humor, because it’s humor that will hardly induce laughter. The seriousness of message that comes out in form of Farhan Akhtar’s poetry, can hardly be related to; in fact, you question the existence of it. In the end, the film is nothing but a mash-up of various emotions. Emotions is not the right word; I’d say behaviour.

The film lacks some very fundamentals that go into film-making. First of all, there is no development of characters. Arjun (Hrithik Roshan), a London-based broker, is supposed to be money-obsessed who lacks the zeal for life. His catharsis happens to soon without taking him to the pinnacle and without striking the chords of the audience. Kabir (Abhay Deol) is seemingly happy with his engagement, and with a couple of everyday arguments, wants to abandon his girlfriend, inspired by his friends and a bull race incident??? Imran (Farhan Akhtar) in search of his father, meets him in Spain, and what is supposed to be a emotional talk between father and son, ends up as an ordeal for the audience. I seriously want to know if that scene touched any one.

The three friends, like you see in Dil Chahta Hai and Rock On, never seem close enough. The poor direction further makes them look like three men from three different planets. For once, I find Abhay Deol absolutely uncharismatic. Hrithik was never meant for that kind of role. He is such a director’s actor as we saw in Guzaarish. Farhan looked out of sorts with a grungy hairstyle and a weird dressing sense. The women hardly had any role but Kalki did a decent job.

So, what is Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara? A bit of poor version of Before Sunrise when Hrithik takes an eye-opening walk with Katrina Kaif and finds himself at the harsh end of the world. Zoya tries hard to make it Dil Chahta Hai kind of humor, but then the line between subtlety and stupidity is so thin. ZNDB is no hangover; at best a parody of the great film. It tries to do a bit of 3 Idiots, but lacks in the quality of humor, development of characters, and compelling cinema that made 3 Idiots a classic. Years from now, Zoya Akhtar would look at ZNDB and say we made millions, and audience like us will pity the state of Indian cinema.

My plea to Zoya Akhtar – Don’t make a film dobara! Let your brother do what he does best.

Okay, I went to watch Delhi Belly for the sole reason that my friends praised it on Facebook. It was like it became the wall post of every user profile I stumbled upon on social media. Also, offline there was enough praise for the film that I was almost became restless until I watch the film.

I’ll begin rude. Delhi Belly is a desi version of Guy Ritchie films not gone exactly like it is supposed to be. I don’t know what this genre is called, so I call it Guy Ritchie genre. Those who have watched Snatch, Rock n Rolla, and Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels know what I mean. Those are the kinds of films that thrive on miscommunication or what we tend to call goof-ups, leading to a chain of comic situations. Whilst Guy Ritchie has hardly ever shot a bad scene, Delhi Belly seemed to be forced comedies in parts. If you talk about funny story of three friends, Dil Chahta Hai still remains my original best!

So, why there are more wrongs than rights for Delhi Belly? Before I say that I should clarify that I liked Delhi Belly but it was not really worth it’s overhype, like we have found an alien on Earth. It was as regular a film as there have been; it just banked on some sexual comedy that wasn’t the best executed as well. For me, Delhi Belly really never took off practically. I know films are not supposed to, but you cannot help wondering throughout that why three people with reasonably respected jobs can’t afford better accommodation and vehicles. Secondly, the humor at times was least comical such as Vir Das’ dance at his ex-girlfriend’s imaginary wedding. Only the last 30 minutes hooked me, which was otherwise a gaffe that seemed more manufactured than natural. I don’t mind a bollywood movie in English but it was easy to see that Imran Khan is not naturally an English language speaker in his real life, and lacked the fluency. I think Vijay Raaz, again outstanding, was the only one who carried the language with utmost ease and without any pressure of sounding ‘English’.

The good part about Delhi Belly is the script (I hope that it’s not lifted or ‘inspired’ from some film that was produced in 1950s in the remotest corner of Latin America; our producers have the talent of script hunting). It’s a wonderfully-weaved script which at times is let down by the director in its execution. The casting is perfect; apart from Imran, most actors are relatively unknown and they deliver fabulously. The comic timing is amazing in parts, and the films rounds off very well. I am not too sure if we needed an Aamir Khan item number in the end.

Delhi Belly, as we say, is a good one-time watch, but lacks the ingredients to turn into a Jaane Bhi Do Yaaron like classic.